Coping With an Addicted Parent
Drug addiction and alcoholism do not just affect the afflicted individual – they take a major toll on everyone involved, from family members to friends to coworkers. Those that tend to be the most affected by having an addicted loved one are the children of active addicts. Children of addicts are more prone to developing cases of substance dependency themselves based on genetic predisposition, and if a parent is actively using around a developing child then mental and emotional trauma will additionally contribute to this likelihood. It is very common for the children of addicts to blame themselves, lacking comprehensive knowledge on addiction and assuming it is a result of their own actions. For this reason it is absolutely essential that the children of addicts have an influential and stable adult in their lives, preferably one who has been through similar experiences to either them or to their parent, thus one who can accurately and effectively explain the reality of the situation.
Many children are afraid to speak up about addiction within the immediate family for fear of being taken away by Child Protective Services. If you still live at home and are living amidst the chaos of addiction, take time to consider whether this would truly be the worst possible outcome. If things are severe enough for CPS to get involved, maybe it would be beneficial for both you and your parent to be separated for a while – in some cases, this is the wake up call a parent needs in order to finally seek treatment. If you have considered this and are not willing to potentially put your family at risk of CPS involvement, seek out an adult figure that you know well and trust thoroughly. Confide in this adult, and listen to any advice they may have. In addition to having a consistent source of adult support, there are numerous support groups and programs available to the children of addicted parents. Search the Internet for local resources and support programs available to those who are like you, going through similar struggles and coping with the same familial issues.
Being the child of an active addict is extremely strenuous for numerous reasons. Aside from taking on the blame and growing up with misguided feelings of guilt and shame, children of addicts are usually required to take on many responsibilities that their mother or father cannot fulfill based on the crippling limitations of the disease. It is not uncommon for the oldest child to take on excessive parental responsibilities, and even essentially raise his or her siblings. This is not only a cause of major stress in the life of the child, but also a cause of severe resentments later on down the line. If your mother or father is battling an addiction to drugs or alcohol, there are innumerable ways to cope and lessen the burden you may feel you must bear. And although you cannot control your parent’s addiction, seeking help for yourself and supporting your other family members will pay off immensely in the long run.
